Masturbation: Is It Homosexuality?

Masturbation. It is the least discussed aspect in men’s meeting in the church and men’s conferences across the country and around the world. However, the trend is changing. More and more, we are seeing men open up to courageously discuss sexual issues like never before. We are seeing men that were trapped, with no hope in sight, find hope and freedom from Secret Sexual Sins. And we are also finding men that are in the sin of homosexuality and young boys, considering the down low lifestyle, coming to an understanding about true sexuality before they are enveloped by deep darkness.

You may or may not know that masturbation is about satisfying intimacy needs. When a man desires to be intimate, he must first find God.

The late Dr. Ed Cole once said that “Prayer is intimacy with God.”

Therefore, if you are searching for true intimacy and true fulfillment, it will only be found in God. Women serves as a companion on earth to help men but eternal fulfillment is only found in God.

Masturbation is a poor substitute for true intimacy because you are trying to achieve some semblance of intimacy on your own. This is called sin, which is defiance of God, autonomy, rebellion, and anarchy.

True fellowship and intimacy begins and ends with knowing the Father, through His Son, the Lord Jesus.

Back in December 5, 2009, we held our first Come Clean Stay Clean Conference. I was still involved in masturbation until December 3, 2009.

Of course in my recent blogs on Relapse, I did masturbate afterwards.

For 3.5 years, I stayed clean until I failed.

For further information, just read my last blogs on relapse.

The reason why I am sharing my personal story is so you can understand that I am not trying to cover myself or run from the issue. I am not trying to exalt myself either. This is not reverse humility. Neither am I making any excuses or trying to save face. I am still early in my recovery and there are some things that are coming to the surface now that I now know how to deal with.

Knowledge puffs up.

Knowledge, humbly applied in wisdom, is the goal so that only One Person is glorified.

Before I fell, I lived in the fear of falling after declaring my freedom in Christ.

It was a desperate struggle on my own power and strength. Coupled with pride and arrogance.

Now that falling is behind me, what is there left?

My testimony is now a questionable testimony. How can I teach others how to be free when I’m still struggling?

Is there any hope? Can recovery be lasting? Or will there be another moment where my urges and impulses overwhelm me to sin against the Lord and my body?

It is out of my failure that I teach you what to look for so that you wouldn’t fail.

All your hope is to be placed in Jesus, not in man.

Man will fail but the Lord and His Word will never fail.

Recognizing at the earliest stages of lusts of the flesh and the mind and how to beat back the urges and impulses is where I am in the Lord. I’m learning how to relying on the Holy Spirit and the Word of God to stay focused, and fight to subdue and have dominion over what my mind and body craves.

Secret Sexual Sins must be fully exposed under the light of the Word and completely rooted out in order for me, and every man and woman to experience lasting peace through the Lord Jesus Christ. There are or were many believers that are or were trapped like me in the maze of masturbation.

As I have stated before, it was during this Come Clean Conference that I first heard through my good friend, Pastor Roger Jamison, pastor of Sword of the Spirit Tabernacle in Brooklyn, NY, that “masturbation is the early stages of homosexuality.”

Then, in another recent men’s meeting held at New Life Christian Center in Hempstead, LI that a Reverend Loring Pasmore stated that “masturbation is homosexuality.”

Here is the reason.

It’s your hand man. It’s your penis, man. You are doing you.

Too often, we tend not to think that masturbation is homosexuality because we try not to declare what we are or were doing is just sexually acting out with an opposite sex image. While we all know that MSM (Men having Sex with Men) is the normal definition of homosexuality, when it comes to masturbation, you are acting out sexually with yourself.

Even with an opposite sex image in your mind, you are still doing you.

You’ve also heard the term “men masturbating men.” No need for details. The term speaks for itself. It is still unnatural sex. Yes, it is a sex act but it is a perverted same sex act.

The justification of a sex act that involves only you and your image, has no legs of justification to stand on.

Here’s why.

You are a man or a male, aren’t you?

Then, as a man, you are doing you.

While the book of Genesis is the book of beginnings, it is there that true sex is established as the First Mentioned Principle in Biblical Hermeneutics. Biblical Hermeneutics is the science of interpreting the Scriptures.

In Genesis 2:18, it’s the first time that the Lord said that it wasn’t good… “And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”

So for all intents and purposes, the Lord makes a woman for Adam. Don’t you just love the Lord how He knew that it was going to be a sexual problem for man and provides a sexual solution? Women is not just for sexual purposes alone but for companionship, compatibility, sharing, loving, caring, and nurturing.

But let’s discuss one of the highest reasons.

Sex!

Get married to one woman first. Then…..

A woman was made to be married and loved. She was also made for a man to “get into.”

Your penis was made for the vagina.

That’s the way it is. Man is looking for sexual connection, not conquest, with someone they could live with for the rest of his life. Someone that is compatible, suitable for his needs.

Sex was designed by the Lord God to be shared between two opposite sex married persons. Sharing sexual pleasure is part of the soul tie or bonding process between husband and wife. You cannot become one flesh with the same sex. It is incompatible. Meaning that the anus was never designed for entry or male penetration by his penis. The anus was designed for exit of human excretion.

Oral sex doesn’t count either.

You cannot be “one flesh” with yourself. That’s part of the empty feeling inside after self sex. Sex wasn’t shared with a wife. It was an isolated attempt to satisfy a selfish need.

Therefore, selflessness must overcome selfishness.

For sex to be sex, the entire process is to be shared.

“Two shall become one flesh.” One plus one equal one.

With masturbation, one plus none equal none.

When it comes to masturbation, it is about a man getting himself off the way he wants to get off sexual tension. And it’s about the fantasy, the arousal, the pretending to have one or many. It is also about escaping relational situations associated with marriage.

For the most part, it is about acting out sexually in uninhibited or lascivious imagination in full swing. He is pretending to have sex with whomever he wants. Porn and still images fill the mind with sexual seduction and the only way to let off tension is to masturbate or by having a live body. Or both.

This is the degrading form of sex where the woman is cheapened to be a sex toy. An object of lust and conquest. This is where her life is not valued except for what is achieved in the bedroom. Such degradation is demonic and depraved.

When it comes to having sex by yourself, there is no question that you are bringing yourself to orgasm.

Homosexuality also include vile acts, either with a person of the same sex or by yourself by using various means and grotesque methods to achieve orgasm. Each accomplished self sex leaves an empty feeling and it also helps drive you to attempt new ways to achieve orgasm. The escalation in the ritual process increases sometimes the adrenaline, testosterone aspect of self sex.

Heightening the process to achieve orgasm is a high within itself.

Masturbation is a ritual that very few escape, but more and more men and women desire to be free. They just haven’t reached a place where the need for it is no longer desirable.

The desire to stop is there but the will to stop fails them because the mind reminds them of the supposed pleasure that would be lost, should you, once and for all, abandon self sex, and truly trust the Lord for complete fulfillment and satisfaction.

Chronic or habitual masturbation is not a mental issue. Masturbation is not necessarily a sign of sexual addiction but it is part of the sexual addiction ritual.

Sexual addiction is defined as one that cannot stop, control, or manage the need for sex.

Therefore, masturbation is an “urges and impulses” issue that lead to experiencing the reward drug dopamine.

Masturbation is coupled at times to satisfy a need for self love, affirmation, and appreciation. Men desire to be touched. Otherwise, they wouldn’t touch themselves.

There is one issue that I will bring up and that is the condemnation issue. After a person releases sexual tension through masturbation, a person feels the euphoria of the moment, but it is short lived. Then the feeling of guilt or remorse sets in. This is a clear indication that you’ve violated the “one flesh” principle in Genesis 2:21-25.

This “empty” feeling that you experience after you have masturbated is an indication to you that you were alone, and it is not good. You sulk, feel down, and that’s a feeling you get every time. This feeling is suppressed because after you get through the remorse process of self sex, you are ready to fantasize, ritualize, and act out sexually all over again.

The looking forward to the next time overwhelms any guilt or condemnation because you can’t wait to experience that feeling. In this is the hopes for true satisfaction but when it comes to false intimacy, there can never be complete satisfaction.

WHY?

No matter how many times you masturbate, you will never escape completely the fact that you violated the “one flesh” principle.

To understand masturbation, there is a wealth of books that cover this subject in-depth.

While there is a lot of pro masturbation books, I would be very careful not to try to justify it because someone else engages in the practice.

Just go to my Sexual Addiction Recovery Page and click the links.

For further discussions on masturbation, please go to our groundbreaking series Secret Sexual Sins on www.BlogTalkRadio.com/prevailingword1

Author: prevailing word ministries

My wife, Valeria and I are the pastors of Prevailing Word Ministries in Brooklyn, NY. We have one daughter, Sherylynne. We are all authors. The Holy Spirit and You, by pastor Valeria, Altered Destiny, A Hustler's Choice, by Sheryl, and The Minister's Crucible and Secret Sexual Sins, by pastor Fred. Please visit BlogTalkRadio.com to listen to our groundbreaking series "Secret Sexual Sins. You may download it free of charge from iTunes.

11 thoughts on “Masturbation: Is It Homosexuality?”

  1. I am truly not trying to be rude, but have you ever sought the advice of a professional mental health counselor? Masturbation and homosexuality? Masturbation is natural and there are even health benefits of it. Reading this post was hard because it has so much misinformation about human sexuality in it.

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    1. I trust that you weren’t rude until the mental health comment was made. With over 30 years in the ministry, I understand what young men are going through, having gone through masturbation for over 30 years myself. I have taken elective college credit courses from Light University on Healthy Sexuality and Sexual Addiction, and took the 60 day accountability course called “Way To Purity” by Setting Captives Free, by Mike Cleveland. So, with trusted material that I’ve studied from, this is not “misinformation.” I trust that you understand that from the Word of God’s perspective that we are to “conform to the image” of Jesus.” To be like Jesus, we adhere to what He taught. If Jesus taught and committed masturbation, then we have permission to conform to His image. But we all know that He didn’t because of Hebrews 4:12-16. As an alleged preacher yourself, give me Scripture to rebut what I shared and we will take it from there. Until then, conviction is apparent. Godly sorrow works repentance that leads to salvation. The only way out of conviction is repentance. I will note again that sexual addiction is the inability to control, stop, or manage sex. Just because a person masturbates, it doesn’t mean they are addicted. However, if you find yourself as a chronic masturbator, evidently you cannot control your urges and impulses. Living the Christian life is about living like Jesus, spirit, soul, and body. Abstaining from sexual immorality is one of many Christian disciplines. The only persons authorized for sex is opposite sex couples, joined in holy matrimony. Scripturally mandated in Genesis 2:21-25, Matthew 19-4-5, and 1 Corinthians 7:2. Self sex is pretend sex with yourself. You think you are having sex with an image. Thus, false sex or false intimacy is deceiving and can never fully satisfy. There is never any Scripture to justify masturbation, much less homosexuality. As I have said, give me Scripture to rebut and we will take it from there.

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      1. The Bible says “a double minded person is unstable in all his ways.” I’d like for you to quantify those that think the way you think of me. And besides, truthful honest discussion requires a very good ability to understand facts, analyze why a person does what he or she does, and correctly address and articulate such findings rather than make a statement to be funny.

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  2. I wasn’t going to leave a reply to this, but since I wasted so much time reading like upon line of ignorance, it was nesscary. Your bible isn’t going to teach you reality. Look at the world and look at the people in it. You sucrutinize and belittle the very people who stand for justice and happiness. If being the gender they should have been in the first place is what will truly make someone happy, who are you to say that is wrong. I hope you find a true holy path. The one of acceptance. Good luck.

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    1. The world isn’t going to teach you reality. 1 John 2:14-15 says, “Love not the world neither the things that are in the world. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes and the pride of life is not of the Father but is of the world. And the world passes away and the lusts thereof. But he that does the will of God abides forever.” Stemming from your comment, God never made a mistake when each person comes out of the womb based on His design of XY chromosomes from the male sperm. But spiritually speaking, because of Adam’s sin, people are born in sin. Isaiah 45:9-10 is about trying to tell the Creator that He made a mistake. Since when humans have the right to tell God that He is wrong? The created doesn’t have a right to rebuke the Creator. Adam was the one that sinned, not God. God loved us and helped us out by sending His Son, Jesus to die for the sins of man. Happiness is only found in God, through His Son the Lord Jesus. False intimacy is about pleasure apart from God. My hope is that in the time you’ve spent reading my blog, you find true happiness in Jesus, and not the world. Finally, luck is left up to chance. I never trust in chance. I trust in the living God and what He said to me in the Bible. If you do not believe the Bible, there is very little, to nothing that I will say that will change your mind. However, faith is trust in the Word of God which is sure and steadfast, and His Word will never, ever fail. You can believe. It’s a matter of who and what you decide to trust in.

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  3. Thank you for responding rationally to my comments. I would like to respond in kind.

    You stated:

    “I trust that you weren’t rude until the mental health comment was made. With over 30 years in the ministry, I understand what young men are going through, having gone through masturbation for over 30 years myself.”

    My concern Pastor, is the impact of guilt and shame regarding the subject of sexuality within Christianity. There is no coincidence that many Christians struggle in this department. We are taught from day one to be suspicious of our sexual selves and deny the fact that we are sexual beings. This sexual suspicion leads to sexual repression; sexual repression leads to guilt and guilt leads to despair. What you are teaching is setting up men for an emotional trap and a dangerous cycle of guilt and shame.

    This cycle looks like this: “If I sin by simply masturbating then I might as well have sexual intercourse; I am sinning any way”. Or if the person masturbates, the guilt and the shame comes in. This is the same guilt and shame you express in your own your words.

    According to Dr. Hernando Chaves

    “Many people feel shame and guilt because of their masturbation habits. Whether it’s a cultural, religious or moral issue, people can be very hard on themselves. The tug of war between what feels natural and pleasurable versus what they were told to refrain from can have lasting harmful effects on a person’s self-esteem, confidence and self-love. Psychosomatic effects can also occur, where physical symptoms are the result of psychological factors (feeling shame, guilt, anxiety can manifest into things like headaches, back pain, chronic pain, etc)”.

    Chaves is a clinical sexologist and sex coach in Beverly Hills, CA. He is a professor of human sexuality at the college level and holds degrees in psychology,
    marriage and family therapy and human sexuality.

    In your comment to me, you state that you want scripture in my response; however, your scripture use regarding masturbation is a reach at best. You stated:

    “To be like Jesus, we adhere to what He taught. If Jesus taught and committed masturbation, then we have permission to conform to His image. But we all know that He didn’t because of Hebrews 4:12-16.”

    First of all, Jesus never spoke on masturbation, second of all, you have not established that masturbation is a sin and lastly your use of Hebrews 4:12-16 fails because you have not
    established masturbation as a sin.

    ” As an alleged preacher yourself, give me Scripture to rebut what I shared and we will take it from there. Until then, conviction is apparent. Godly sorrow works repentance that leads to salvation.”

    There are no scriptures that address masturbation; you have not provided any. What you have given me is scriptures used like puzzle pieces being applied to the wrong puzzle.

    The most common misused scripture is Mathew 19:4-5, in context Jesus Chrsit was not speaking of marriage. No He was actually pointing out the hypocrisy of the Pharisee. Many of them were divorcing the wives for selfish reasons eventhough the Law said not to. This breaking of the Holy Scripture did not prevent them from calling out others for their sin. Hypocrisy. Jesus was quoting from the Holy Scriptures to expose these divorcing Pharisee. It is all about context.

    Your use of Gen. 2:21-25 is misguided as well because it tells us nothing about sexual intimacy, nothing about marriage and clearly nothing about any other relationships. What we are left with are assumptions. Gen, 2:21-25 is one of the creation stories and not our glimpse into human sexuality. The other creation story is found in Gen. 1:26-28

    26And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth. 27So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. 28And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.

    Again, the creation story is the creation story and not the sexual story. If your argument is sex is only for marriage then it must be that sex is only for procreation. Then marriage must only be for procreation. This is what happens if you use the creation story to exclude others.

    Lastly, I will say that masturbation if done too often could be damaging and if it becomes addictive, it is wise to seek professional help for sexual addiction. I agree with you there. We disagree on every thing else. I also think it is a weak argument to state that one must be suffering with a thing because they call you out on your misinformation.

    Like you I see many Christians struggling with this issue. They struggle because there are way too many misinformed and guilt ridden leaders who are teaching them that is wrong to love themselves for who they are.

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    1. I also appreciate the civility of this important discussion. I believe that common ground may or may not be achieved but as we debate, much could be learned, whether we agree or not.

      Humbly speaking, one simple question requires one simple answer. Did God create the penis for the vagina or for the hand of a man? Did God create the woman for the man? Does the exit (anus – oral) of a man or a woman qualifies as the place where the penis is to go? Your answers do fall short of context and harmony according to Biblical Hermeneutics. The best that you have done is provide reasoning that we are commanded to cast down according to 2 Corinthians 10:4-5. The First Mention Principle of Genesis 2:21-25 clearly establishes the proper use of the penis. Masturbation violates that principle.

      Therefore, hand stroking the penis to orgasm is substituting or an attempt to usurp, replace, or supplement the proper use of the vagina as the only true design for sex to fulfill the “one flesh” principle.

      True sexual intercourse (penis and vagina, not penis and hand, penis and anus, penis and mouth), as designed by God, is the only valid and viable means of becoming “one flesh.”

      God ordained sex to be shared between male and female, not male in male because another male is incompatible for sex. Men do not have a vagina, last I checked. The vagina is the only place designed for the penis by God. The penis and the vagina is the only place where two become one flesh. Therefore, it is impossible for a man to have sex with another man to become one flesh. Marriage is the only institution designed by God in Genesis 2:21-25 where sex is authorized. “Two shall be one flesh,” also known as the “One flesh” principle is the only principle by which a male and female become one flesh.

      Self sex does not qualify as “one flesh” because God said, “two shall become one flesh.” Therefore, sex is to be shared by two opposite sex individuals, thus becoming one flesh. Masturbation violates the one flesh principle because God said, “It is not good that man be alone.” So in His perfect wisdom, God created a woman for Adam, suitable to his needs. God did not create another man. Man is to “leave father and mother and cleave to his wife.”

      God did not say “leave father and father or leave mother and mother.” Anyway you look at it, the Lord is much smarter and it is best to follow the Manufacturer’s (see Isaiah 45:9-10) use as told to us in the Scriptures. Masturbation, chronic masturbation, occasional masturbation, if Jesus did masturbate, then we can follow suit. Jesus was tempted but He never fell into temptation, including being tempted to masturbate. He was in all points tempted, yet He did not sin. All points includes masturbation.

      I can’t, for the life of me, understand why people can’t see this unless people intentionally close their eyes and ears. Too often, we look for silent justification to sin or we attempt to silence the truth by learned individuals of profound self concocted reasoning that have yet to learn true freedom in Christ from every enslaving yoke, including freedom from masturbation according to John 8:32.

      When a man looks to himself for sex, it is defiance of God. God wants us to look to Him for total satisfaction, love, and fulfillment. I’m quite sure you understand that no matter the emotional trauma experienced, the way I feel must take a back seat to the design of sex by God. I know that when people are told it’s a sin to masturbate, withdrawal symptoms occur. But when God’s Word issues the command to be holy as He is holy, God didn’t ask us how we felt about it. God expects obedience. Cain got emotional and turned it into murder.

      To be holy as He is holy requires us not to let our emotions deter us from obedience to be holy. Because you strongly feel that masturbation is not a sin because I agree, there is no “Thou shalt not masturbate” in the Scriptures, but since I believe, based on the clearly established “one flesh” principle in Genesis 2:21-25, masturbation is fantasy sex, or false intimacy, and it is equivalent to homosexuality because you are doing you in fake sex. Being that there is no Scriptural evidence that you’ve provided that says, “Thou shalt masturbate,”

      I will err on the Scriptural evidence provided to “Keep yourself pure.” “Abstain from every appearance of evil.” “Flee sexual immorality.” “Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband.” According to Mike Cleveland’s website Setting Captives Free, over three million persons clicked the sight to start dealing with deliverance from porn and masturbation. Over 300,000 have started and completed the 60 day course.

      This discovery of evidence indicates to us all that deliverance from porn and masturbation is extremely difficult, but quite achievable. The underlying reason is because people have a hard time accepting the truth that porn and masturbation is bondage to fulfilling self sexual appetites. According to Colossians 3:5, we are to deaden and deprive of power, sexual appetites. This is done by falling on the grace of God for lasting freedom.

      God desires for us to be completely satisfied in Him and not in ourselves. 2 Timothy 3:2 says that in the last days…men will be lovers of themselves (self sex included) lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God…”And believe me, I am quite sure you will agree, that masturbation is very pleasurable. But I have found Someone more pleasurable than masturbation. “At His right hand (Jesus) there are pleasures evermore.” The need, desire, and will to masturbate is extinguished because “With long life He will satisfy me and show me His salvation.”

      It is my job to be like Jesus and pray in the time of temptation. Seek true intimacy in prayer to God to satisfy the longing in my heart for true intimacy with the living God in righteousness and true holiness according to Romans chapter 6.

      The proper outlet for sexual release is sex with the opposite person in marriage. Any other outlet for sexual release is sin which violates God’s original intent for sex stated in Genesis 2:21-25.

      I know that we will go back and forth. You have stated your position. I have stated my position with Scripture in accordance with Biblical Hermeneutics. God sent Jesus to set us free from every sin, including masturbation because the sin of masturbation violates the original intent of God’s design based on the “one flesh” principle stated in Genesis 2:21-25.

      By doing sex, God’s way according to Genesis 2:21-25, we will never be in a position to deny our sexuality. Rather, we fully embrace our sexuality within healthy Biblical context and guidelines. To deny our sexuality is never God’s intent. God mandated that we look no place else for true sexual fulfillment as prescribed in the “one flesh” principle established in Genesis 2:21-25.

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  4. One thought for good measure. How could a practicing homosexual be an ordained or licensed minister? It appears to me that when the Bible is clear about standards, Paul was not playing, let alone, the Head of the Church. Does it make sense for Jesus, the Savior of the world, to call people into the ministry that abide in darkness to preach to those who know Him and are conveyed into His marvelous light? So far, no Biblical references to refute truth. Enemies of the cross dare not try to find truth for fear of acknowledging that they were wrong all along.

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  5. The whole concept of truth is that Someone is right and the devil, and his children are wrong. Anarchists always say that God is wrong, the Bible is wrong and therefore, those that agree with God, and the correctly divided Word of God is wrong. Here’s the easiest way to understand that those that are against God are always wrong. They have to die and stand in the judgment as condemned already persons with no escape. So far, not one has died and escape the portals of Hades, except Jesus. Everyone else must be judged and placed in the lake of fire for rejecting truth.

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  6. You kind of figure that when God said, “All the trees of the Garden you may freely eat but of the tree of the knowledge of Good and evil, you shall not eat of it, for in the day you eat of it, you shall surely die,” that God was telling the truth all along. So far, nobody came back from the dead to tell God that He was wrong.

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