Back in 2008, by the grace of God, the Word of the Lord came to me. The Holy Spirit spoke to me while in the middle of watching porn and masturbating these Words.
“Is this what you do to Me after all the good I’ve done for you?”
It was then that I was done with porn.
I was going to make this short but that is not the case.
I searched for help on the Internet and came across many sites. Pastor Roger Jamison, pastor of Sword of the Spirit Tabernacle in Brooklyn, NY steered me to some sites where I could get additional help on porn addiction.
“The Pink Cross Foundation” headed by former porn star Shelley Lubben was not one of those sites, but I happened upon that site and it gave me additional information about what went on behind the set of porn shoots.
She testified before Congress and other places about her participation in the porn industry. She shared passionately about women being abused sexually and really laid it on the table what was done behind the scenes of pornography. It was clear in my mind that she struck a cord with many about the things done on the set.
As some of you know, women would travel miles to California to star in movies. When they do not make it, some of them resort to class B movies, porn, strip clubs, escort services, and prostitution to make money and some how get noticed. But to no avail, many of them get trapped in doing porn and never make it.
I understand that porn is a very dangerous, dirty place where drugs and alcohol would be available on the set to help the women cope with the rape and abuse that men and other women would do to unsuspecting aspiring actresses. Some of them never make it past the first day because the abuse would be devastating, and they would never return. To make things worse, there would always be the fear of contracting STDs, including HIV/AIDS. A few have even committed suicide because the shame, stigmatization, being diagnosed with STDs, loneliness, hopelessness, and other emotionally traumatic events would be too much for them to bear.
The Pink Cross Foundation is a site that attempts to reveal what really goes on in porn, however, as helpful as some of the information is, some of the pictures and stories are a bit over the top.
In other words, the pictures displayed on The Pink Cross Foundation are racy.
Even I had to refrain from looking at that site because it is sexually provocative and obviously explicit.
This is not to say that these stories are not true, or juiced up to gain more attention. It is to say that when a man goes to this, or similar sites, it’s almost like looking at porn all over again. Many will argue that it’s not the site that’s the problem. It’s the man with unbridled lust in his heart and mind.
That’s partly true and many will disagree, but the problem is twofold.
ONE: According to Dr. William Struthers “porn hijacks the brain.”
He shared that when a man looks at porn and masturbates, he is pretending to have sex with the person. While a man doesn’t need porn to masturbate, his mind goes through a ritual of search and discovery, meditation or fantasy, and then he engages. Sometimes one picture could set him into search mode and then he “locks in” on what he wants sexually, to act out sexually.
The photos on The Pink Cross Foundation could be one of these pictures that would set a man off sexually. Just like a supermarket magazine stand. A woman on a street corner, a movie with soft porn sex scenes, a man could be sexually influenced to pursue porn and masturbation.
Porn is the fuel or accelerant of the sexual immorality world. No man watches porn and doesn’t act out sexually in masturbation, adultery, fornication, bisexuality, or homosexuality.
The lust in a man’s heart is what must be addressed. It is addressed on the cross. Jesus died for our sins to set us free from sin but also to appease the wrath of God. The wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all unrighteousness. Jesus paid that penalty because God pour upon Jesus, His wrath.
Therefore, because of Jesus, when we repent and turn from our wicked ways, we, by the help of the Holy Spirit are capable of walking in obedience to the Word of God to abstain from the very appearance of evil.
The power and guilt of sin was removed. In the presence of sin, we walk in obedience to His Word to never let sin have dominion over us. It’s a work of His grace not to continue in sin, but to live free of it.
It is true that man needs to be more disciplined to ignore what a woman is wearing, however, some women wear certain clothing to be sexually noticed. Sexually immoral women will make a calculated maneuver to attract male attention.
That one moment of flirt, to her, is her power over man.
I’ve said all this to agree with EX Ministries that “The Pink Cross Foundation’s intent, yet, as long as the gospel is absent, is undoubtedly involved in the transmission of sexually provocative material.
Please observe this YouTube for consideration.
TWO: When we were involved in porn, we men would sometimes read “Forum,” “Hustler,” “Playboy,” and other sexually explicit reading material. There would be racy stories that would get our “engines” running. There is some material that lead men back into the world of porn. For those of us that were delivered, we are on the lookout for anything that would tease us to go back and “investigate.”
Even on FB, there are female pictures that stimulates the minds of men to investigate.
The face, the hair, the clothing, the position, the smile.
Men are easily seduced. On FB or other social medias, all it takes is a captivating look and a man is easily swayed to look lustfully at a woman.
“Hell and destruction are never full, so the eyes of a man are never satisfied.” Proverbs 27:20
Any website that uncovers the underworld of porn that is absent of the gospel of Jesus Christ is just another substitute porn site.
It is a very strong statement but here is the reason.
“…the gospel of Christ…..is the power of God unto salvation….”
This is the cut up version of Romans 1:16.
Women that explain the dangers, perils, documented stories of the sufferings of women in porn are to be commended, however, when it fails to point people back to the cross of Christ, it is very troubling.
EX Ministries with G. Craige Lewis and Tetaun Moffett has done a remarkable job in pointing out the fact that the gospel of Jesus Christ is central to a man’s deliverance. And that this gospel is absent from The Pink Cross Foundation. I fully understand that the intent of The Pink Cross Foundation is to reveal the dark side of porn so that men and women that deliberately watch porn would be shocked to the degree that we would never watch another women get harmed. However, the gospel must be at the top of the list. Man is incapable of delivering man from sin. If we were capable, the death of Jesus wouldn’t have been necessary.
We all know that women are victims.
Then again, there are some that do not know.
We get it.
However, when we point to ourselves without pointing to Jesus, we make things complicated. Complicated?
We say that they are doing a good work of exposing the dark works, but do we do an equally good job at pointing to the Only One that can fully and completely deliver? The Scriptures tell us that “He saves to the uttermost.”
I also understand that it takes courage beyond courage to address sexual immorality, but we must point to the Savior to ensure that He gets the full credit and not make it about ourselves.
Years ago, I tried to do the same thing. I made “Come Clean” about ME and MY deliverance and it failed miserably. I was selfish!
I wanted disciples to follow me.
God has no rivals. He alone saves. He alone gets ALL the glory.
Yes, God uses us but we turn it all to God and keep none for ourselves.
God had to destroy the work of my hands so that the work of His hands would emerge. Anything that man does, apart from the Lord, is a work that must be destroyed because God is God, and no one shares His glory. He has no rivals. Every rival failed, and every rival must fail.
At the same time or more so, what must be paramount is a pointing back to the gospel as the “…power of God unto salvation.”
Without the power of God to save, deliver, and set free men and women that are held captive, we invite men to return to the vomit from whence they came.
Having said this, I would strongly urge a change in our approach to deal with porn.
1. The gospel of Jesus Christ is the only way to deal with sin.
While it is important to sound the alarm about women as victims, when the gospel is absent, deliverance must be absent. God’s terms isn’t negotiable.
2. Throw away the gimmicks of men.
Men are deliberately evasive.
Paul said, “And my speech and my preaching were without enticing words of men’s wisdom…” and “We have renounced the hidden things of shame, not walking in craftiness nor handling the word of God deceitfully.”
The world and some church circles loves its gimmicks.
EX Ministries mentioned “Porn and Pancakes.” The subject of porn is a very avoidable subject when it comes to men. I know that men will not come to a meeting when it’s just about porn. Pancakes is a gimmick. But at the end of the day, will it be pancakes that deliver, or the power of the gospel as a person repents? While the Bible has a history of God using items to attract men, (burning bush – Jesus and divine healing, casting out devils, etc.), ultimately, we must understand that the Spirit of God always speaks before God uses an item to attract.
When Jesus preached His first major address, He didn’t have pancakes.
“But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
There were no pancakes served that day.
Jesus pointed out the origin of porn. Lust in a man’s heart.
But we do not need to use gimmicks to try to pull men to talk about this subject.
Just the gospel of Jesus Christ.