So Jamal Bryant, you are back in the news.
But it’s not about BLM, Ferguson, or with Farrakhan.
Once again, allegedly in bed with a woman whom you’ve allegedly impregnated and had the nerve to tell the mother to abort the child.
Well, it’s no surprise.
Due to possibly the potential for litigation, he is closed mouth about the facts. This is to be expected. If adultery/fornication didn’t occur, if there is no child matching his DNA, and if the paternity tests are determined to be false (if it is determined to be false), then there is nothing to hide and there would be no ambiguity.
If a woman accused me of fathering a child, my instant reaction without a lawyer would be to present facts that can’t be denied. And then tell them to be prepared for a countersuit that will cost you dearly. Or worse, not bring a countersuit and let the Lord handle the situation.
Or as my enemy, I pray for you, bless you, and forgive you.
The latter is preferred because in innocence you have no ill will for those that are sent by the devil to destroy your life, marriage, and ministry.
At this point it is alleged but there’s reason to believe that his attorney urged him not to divulge details. Possibly and potentially because of litigation. On the other hand, it is possible for the cry of wolf to be assumed.
It has happened before that women lie and conceive many non factual situations to force a man to capitulate into relationships. If he refuses to enter into a relationship after it is determined that the child is his, she goes for his paycheck, and financially destroys a man when he refuses.
That’s why the book of Proverbs is a Men’s Meeting Book for foolish, gullible, boneheaded above the waist and below the waist men that can’t maintain their sexual discipline.
The first 8 chapters is about wisdom to avoid the sexually, loud, emotionally unstable, harlot, dress as and act like whores, contentious, and crafty women.
Running from his responsibilities, he works “under the books” so that his SSN doesn’t trigger automatic court ordered garnishments for child support.
This is nothing new.
But let’s say that what she is saying and doing is true.
If the case is solidly against Bryant, first, there must be a call for him to step down from ministry but as with most men caught in adultery in the pulpit, far from happening because of pride in his heart (see 1 John 2:15-17).
Second, there must be limitless measures of accountability people to ensure that he gets help. Not to return to ministry, but to return to the Lord (if he ever knew the Lord to begin with).
Several years ago, 2008 to be exact, when I came out of the sin of porn and masturbation, the Lord told me that others will fall. And the list continues to grow.
Now, anyone that advocates killing a child to cover a pregnancy which occurred in the course of committing the sin of adultery and fornication is just as cold as David is by having Uriah killed to cover the pregnancy of Bathsheba.
Jamal Bryant advocates murder.
These Scripture comes to mind.
1 John 3:15 “Whoever hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him.”
Hebrews 13:4 “Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.”
Revelation 21:8 “But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death.”
Now it’s a matter of true repentance, not remorse.
But should Bryant not truly repent, those of you that follow his ministry, you have already made a decision to either stay or leave. For the most part, most of you have stayed.
2 Peter chapter 2 and Jude is your word of warning.
The mother of the child had enough sense not to commit another sin. Murder the baby. Her sin is just as grievous before the Lord.
Whoredom in the house of the Lord is just as evil and wicked.
Whether Jamal played her or she played him, it doesn’t matter who played who. What matters is that a gross sin was committed before the Lord and she doesn’t get a free pass for fornicating.
Ladies must be held accountable just as the men and not be given the benefit of the doubt. The Bible is clear about avoiding fornication or sexual immorality.
The Bible is clear about holiness for male and female.
So there is no free pass for the woman caught in the sin of fornication.
Just like Bryant, forgiveness and cleansing is extended, but this could have been avoided. All she had to do was walk away. Now if she planned all along to use her femininity to capture the heart of Jamal, it worked, but God was grieved in the process.
She got what she wanted, Jamal got what he wanted, and the devil got what he wanted.
But God didn’t get what He demanded.
Godly discipline resulting in genuine holiness without hypocrisy.
This is not the time to get mad at the messenger, for if there would be no mess, there would be no need for the messenger.
The call for her to repent and get it right before the Lord goes to her as well.
All it takes is humility of heart.
Now if she has done so, then she need to be consistent in her walk before God to never commit fornication again.
For the sake of her relationship with God and for her child, righteousness must be established as a lifelong goal, and to never forsake the Lord in disobedience to His Word.
Now to Bryant, we know how this will probably go.
You will refuse to repent because you’ve seen no reason to repent. Or you did “repent” BUT the juices to sin again are attacking you in your secret hidden from public life of porn and masturbation.
You are feeling remorse right now which is that you are sorry that you were caught and it is public knowledge.
Your Secret Sexual Sins are called out in the open according to Psalm 90:8 and Luke 12:2.
Real men of God would either abstain from sexual immorality or if they were caught in sexual immorality, look to regain a right relationship with God by finding stronger men of accountability to help you love the Lord again with all your heart.
This is done by walking away from ministry for the time established by your accountability people. In any time away from the pulpit, there is no hunger or desire to preach, minister, or any of that. Your sole goal is to love the Lord again with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength.
You do not establish the rules of accountability. You do not set a date to return to the pulpit. You do not get to call the shots. Guest preaching and TV show hosting is postponed until you are restored in favor with the Lord and your accountability people note the real change in your heart.
For the length of your season away, you completely submit to random tough questioning of your sexual life. Your prayer and Word life. Your praise and worship life.
You avoid avoiding tough questions like….
“When was the last time you watched porn and masturbated?
When was the last time you prayed and sought the Lord for intimacy?
Are you growing in your relationship with the Lord?
Are you growing stronger to prevent yourself from touching yourself to arouse yourself sexually to masturbate?
Are you cutting off your right hand everyday in radical amputation to avoid sexual sins of the heart and eyes?
Have you plucked out your right eye in radical amputation to avoid filing in your mind sexually provocative pictures to file in your soul to mastubate off of later?
Have you employed fasting to help you subdue the urges and impulses of sexuality in your flesh?
Have you put to death and cut off the head of Goliath according to Colossians 3:5?
Are you gaining the victory by the help of the Hoy Spirit to seek God in the time of temptation to escape according to 1 Corinthians 10:13?
Is holiness developing in your life according to 2 Corinthians 7:1, Hebrews 12:14, and 1 Peter 1:15?
Your lack intimacy with God is identified in your lack of seeking fulfillment of intimacy in prayer to God. This is the well where you thirst again. At the bottom of all earthly wells is mud.
In the well of life, from top to bottom, there is nothing but clear fresh, living water to drink from.
But drinking from the well of sexual immorality, like the Samaritan woman at the well, you keep returning to the well. Never to be satisfied.
It’s time to drink living water from the Lord.
Leonard Ravenhill once said that “No man is greater than his prayer life.”
YOU must replace physical intimacy with intimacy with God in prayer.
Ed Cole once said “Prayer is intimacy with God.”
IF you have no prayer life, you are not intimate with God.
If you have a sexual immoral life, you are intimate with the devil.
Whenever you are ready Jamal Bryant, you can make a serious move to stop the madness raging in your flesh.
We expect victory from this moment on in Jesus.
Finally, if there is no repentance from either of them, and I expect the protective of sin crowd to cry foul for this open letter, read 1 Corinthians 6:9-11
“Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God.”
It’s time to return to the true teaching of the Scriptures and reject the two stepping people and preachers have been doing in hypocrisy.
Women attempting to seduce pastors for sex.
How to seduce a pastor may not be the question. How to take him further in his already seduced mind is the question.
Saying the right words, sitting in the right place to be seen, wearing the right clothing that is enticing enough for him to look your way, and greeting him after service every Sunday until there is a connection established for more “dialogue.”
Get on a few ministerial teams, get connected and involved so as to set up the next move.
Be versatile, and befriend his wife. If the wife feels safe with you, the hard part is done.
Be faithful for the wrong reasons. When he’s preaching, connection seeking sexually immoral women finish his sentences out loud as he is preaching, they say “amen” to be heard and noticed, be outspoken, engaging, and involved in his conversations apart from service, and during service.
Try to get his personal email to continue “dialogue.” Better yet, social media, one on one chat rooms.
There’s always the Jezebel approach and the adultress approach. Or both.
But what is it really about?
The doors are open for this wickedness when a pastor is lured by seductive sexually immoral women and fails to close the door to porn and masturbation in his private life.
Leading into 2016, a new operation is setting up to take down pastors. Like clockwork, the next level of sexual immorality with a pastor rises from within the church. All it takes is for a pastor to commit to going to the next level.
Like one married pastor of a large mega church in Florida who hooked up with an exotic dancer/strip club/porn star for a year and a half, regularly flying to Spain to hook up sexually.
These rendezvous usually either happen on the Internet, or while “ministering,” after service is over, while they return to their hotel room, they watch porn and masturbate, and then desire what they’ve seen on the screen portrayed in real life.
Some sexually immoral women in local churches wait for months before they move. Some come right in and go to work. Some pastors see it and apply all the Scriptural disciplines and establish strong spiritual and physical firewalls.
Other pastors call upon prayer warriors to establish the perimeters. They also call upon elderly church women to approach and interrogate the “new arrivals” to determine their intent.
Other pastors set the watch infinitim to ensure the perimeter is impenetrable.
The wife automatically sounds the alarm and goes into warning mode. Husbands fail to see things that other women do. The wife shares critical marriage saving measures to ward off demonic invasions.
The sexually immoral women are there for one reason. To have sex with a pastor, destroy his relationship with God, destroy his marriage, his wife and children, if any, destroy their churches and ministries, destroy other marriages in his sphere of pastoral influence, and seal their decent into perversion and hell.
Pastors who are loose in their Secret Sexual Sins lives are bound to fall unless they recover themselves from their secret lives.
As the late David Wilkerson once said, they need to cry out to God for deliverance from lust.
Many pastors struggle with lust in their hearts after being tempted time and time again.
When a pastor cannot stop watching women in secret, their eyes travel in service. Their eyes locate the next “eye candy.”
Before a pastor embraces them in bed, they’ve embraced them in their hearts.
As in one church, a pastor has a lot of sexually provocatively dressed women attending church.
In other local churches, the traps are about to be set. Pastors do not realize that the one that the pastor had his eyes on was knowingly and or unknowingly waiting to be located.
Few understand how the realm of the spirit operates.
Lust is a spirit.
When a connection need to be made, the demons communicate to make the connection happen.
There is no distance or time in the realm of the spirit. However, warfare is intense to stop the plans of darkness from coming to fruition and it is equally intense for darkness to see evil plans fulfilled.
The ultimate intent is to discredit God and His Word. To place doubt about the standard.
Just because people fail the standard, it didn’t mean the standard has failed.
When a pastor insists on pursuing darkness, they will not let God and His Word get in the way. As they will even ignore the ultimate ultimatum from God. Love for sin overcomes the tug of God on the heart.
Pastors are oblivious and or they deliberately ignore any divine intervention to fulfill the lusts in their mind and flesh.
Therefore, things connect spiritually before they connect mentally, and then physically.
God does that in Isaiah 46:9-12
“Remember the former things of old, For I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is none like Me, Declaring the end from the beginning, And from ancient times things that are not yet done, Saying, ‘My counsel shall stand, And I will do all My pleasure,’ Calling a bird of prey from the east, The man who executes My counsel, from a far country. Indeed I have spoken it; I will also bring it to pass. I have purposed it; I will also do it.”
God summons people for His purposes, but could it be true for the devil?
“Now it happened, as we went to prayer, that a certain slave girl possessed with a spirit of divination met us, who brought her masters much profit by fortune-telling.”
While this isn’t about a lustful spirit, yet, the fact they she “met” them indicates a demonic encounter to stop the power of God.
Hence, the whole purpose behind seducing a pastor.
However, because of seduction already operating in the secret life of a pastor, the adultery seals the deal.
Already, the sexually immoral woman is in position to seduce a pastor and she will pull out all the stops.
It is a form of witchcraft, sorcery, and it’s combined with attempting to establish power over male leadership.
Attraction. Sexual appeal. Womanly ways and mannerisms. Exposure of certain flesh. Feminine assertiveness, assurance, and reassurance. Confidence or being in close proximity to feel that a pastor could confide in her. Affection and inhibition. What she suggests can’t be resisted. Any attempts to suppress her ways is easily persuaded against. Her pressing the issue and persuasions work the soul of the pastor to yield to her. To say no to her is a bad move. She works herself to a level of indispensability and dependability. Essentially, you can’t do without her. Things once said that she couldn’t hear are spoken to her freely. Even about your wife and marriage. You have her ear when you need her when the wife is away or even when your wife is near. Phone calls, texting, personal trips. She enjoys your company. Constantly flatters and supports the man of God as if she was his wife. Will defend to the death in unquestioned loyalty everything the pastor does. Becomes an outspoken representative of the pastor.
Walking while sleeping, the devil sows seeds of lust to take things to the next level.
Innocent conversations turn personal and often leads to suggestive actions. Eye contact, hand contact, hands on the shoulder or touching the forearm, hands around the waist, stroking the hand, hugging, kissing on the cheek that leads to kissing the lips, giving of small gifts of expressing seemingly innocent signs of affection.
All of these and other issues can cause a pastor to drop his guard because he feels safe, secure, and confident with her.
If the pastor is married, his wife is comfortable enough that even certain activities are permitted. She suspects very little from her and trusts that nothing would happen. But it’s a clear set up. Something is soon to happen.
Then when it’s safe, she makes her move.
Pastor, just like the Scriptures says, you are like sheep going to the slaughter. Like a bird for the snare. Like an arrow for the liver.
She strikes and his decent into hell is complete.
She walks away to her next assignment.
Well, as I have said a very short time ago, pastors and adultery is not the surprise issue. We all get highly upset about it and treat it with disgust, but look deeper and you will see that porn and masturbation in a pastor’s life is the foundation of all adultery. There are two kinds of adultery.
- Sight Adultery. Matthew 5:27-28.
- Physical Adultery. Exodus 20:14 & 1 Corinthians 7:2.
To top it off, this pastor takes church funds ($22,000.00 over time) to pay for the high end of sexual addiction of acting out his fantasy.
Yes, married pastors that sin sexually will take things to the next level in the world of sexual sins.
According to Dr. Patrick Carnes’ this is the “cycle of sex addiction,”
1. Thoughts or fantasy.
3. Acting Out.
Level one sexual addiction involves porn, masturbation, prostitutes, and adultery with mistresses, and fornication should a professing believer or sinner isn’t married.
Not everyone is a sex addict, but when you are only controlling and managing your sexual appetites, you are determining the frequency, time, and preferences to act out sexually other than with your wife.
After the fantasy of masturbation gets old, the next line to cross is illegal sex with another man or woman.
As I have said before, the lines that people say they wouldn’t cross are crossed eventually.
There was one comment in the article that was interesting. Words to the effect…….“Aren’t there more important things for Charisma to report?”
When it comes to pastors and adultery in the church, the Lord is exposing the leaders that profess to know Him with their mouths but their hearts are far from the Lord (see Matthew 15:8). There is no question that this is a serious issue in the house of the Lord. It brings into question their relationship with the Lord and with their wives.
This is not the last report because we know that there are ongoing incidences even as we read this and other articles.
These are the last days and sadly, many will pay the price for walking away from the Lord. Then again, there are others that commit this sin who were never saved to begin with. We don’t know what’s in the heart of this pastor, but clearly Hebrews 13:4 and Revelation 21:8 is in play unless true repentance and faith toward God is made.
Another thing that the Lord told me was that satan hasn’t brought out his best.
IF you are a pastor and you are struggling with porn and masturbation, and you have been tempted to take things to the next level. Meaning that you haven’t crossed the line into prostitution and committing adultery with a mistress, this is the time to rein in your sexual appetite and get help from the Lord.
You are about to get exposed and the Lord loves you enough to reveal the dirt in your heart so that you can get things right with Him.
No man commits adultery, watches porn, or masturbates without first divorcing himself from his relationship with the Lord.
And let us not forget that another wife and family is destroyed. The wife will undergo many seasons of despair, anguish, embarrassment, and pain as this is publicly laid out. And the mistress who is in need of deliverance. She played a crucial role in the downfall of this pastor. While it is possible that she is unsaved, she too, is in need of the Savior.
The article about this pastor taking $22,000.00 to pay for his adultery could be read here.
We understand the impact of this incident that potentially over 400 pastor’s would be revealed. However, sometimes we do not count on a pastor to commit suicide. Sadly, it may not be the last pastoral suicide for pastors with their names caught on the list.
We grieve for the family he left behind. They somehow have to pick up the pieces to understand the magnitude of his Secret Sexual Sins and his suicide. Grace and healing is available from the throne of God. It will take time and we should understand that. No family speedily recovers from this tragedy. However, recovery and healing is possible. No one can ever fathom the loss, let alone the reason behind this tragic loss.
It is not safe to say that there would be no more pastoral suicides. Pastoral suicides has become all too common. We really do not know how many pastors commit suicide after such a discovery, but it is beginning to seem like there is no other reason. We know that the work load of a pastor, depending upon demographics, attendance, and counseling of people will take its toll.
Few know how to get away and get with God to recover.
Being a pastor places a strain on marriages.
While we do not know the inner details of their marriage, it is enough to say that every marriage is different. Dynamics are different and how to gauge the health of a marriage can only be done by the couple going through the marriage and what steps ministers and wives take to navigate the difficulties associated with marriage and ministry.
Sadly, the other end of the spectrum is that most pastors believe that they are indispensable. Or that they are super heroes and can save everybody while refusing to look after themselves. We are not saying that this is the reason, but it could be a vital part of the equation.
The other thing that is of grave importance is the pastor’s secret lives and their sexual activities outside of their marriages.
Secret lives include porn and masturbation, combined with acting out sexually with persons other than your wife, to be very specific. It underscores the importance to get before God to keep your heart clean, and to have “other eyes” on your life that you feel safe to let your hair down.
No pastor and his wife can do no wrong than to have someone to talk to and be transparent with to ensure that the devil has no place in their lives. Men are more vulnerable and too, they are more frightened to expose the secrets lurking in the hearts. It makes them feel less of a man and out of control.
But we should already know that God see us (see Psalm 90:8), and our secret sins are before the countenance of God.
The devil takes no prisoners according to John 10:10 and 1 Peter 5:8-9a. Therefore we should do everything in our power to keep our heart from traveling into the dark places. For in the dark places, no pastor can fellowship with God while walking with devils.
We pray God’s comfort on the family.
The story about this sad tragedy could be read here.
Just a few days ago, the Lord told me that the devils on the earth have said, “If the believers knew how to walk like Christ, we would be under their feet every day.”
The price of adultery among pastors is always incalculable. In this hour where sexual immorality is plaguing the world, the church needs to be a beacon of light in a dark world. But when the devil can cause a well known minister to fall into Secret or Overt Sexual Sins, it gives our work of the ministry another black eye.
We disqualify ourselves and render ourselves unfit for the service of the Master.
The world will look at us a incapable of living to the standards that we’ve been preaching to them about.
However, just because people fail the standard, it doesn’t mean that the standard failed in and of itself.
Jesus said, “Heaven and earth will pass away but My Words will never pass away.”
Preachers. The last thing we need is to give the devil more ammunition to choke the church into submission.
The devils is not looking for us to “tap out.”
This anaconda is looking to squeeze the life out of the church and swallow us whole.
But Jesus said, “The gates of hell shall not prevail against the church.”
First, based on the story, the wife of Tullian Tchividjian, the son of the eldest daughter of Billy Graham, admitted to committing adultery. In turn, or should I say, in RETURN, he felt justified to commit adultery too.
Years ago, when I came out from the darkness of Secret Sexual Sins, I took note of the many ministers that were caught in the web of sexual sins.
One by one, they would fall.
The Lord would tell me that this would not be the last. That more would fall along the way.
The Lord was true to the letter.
In both cases of the wife committing adultery and the husband committing adultery, two wrongs do not make a right.
Ministry is fair game and is a level playing field.
From the plains of Moab (Mother of All Battles) to today, sexual immorality to destroy a ministry is ever present.
It is clear that when you leave your family vulnerable, there is a good chance that satan will take advantage of it.
Sex is a very powerful tool that the enemy uses to destroy ministers and their ministries. As Paul said, we must take heed, lest we fall.
As many of us have been saying, no one is exempt from sexual temptation. If we fail to watch ourselves every moment, we will be sucked under the undercurrent and drown in sin. If no one rescues us, we are forever lost according to Revelation 21:8.
It doesn’t matter the name brand of preachers.
It’s a level playing field. We are all fair game.
We do not have to be well known and then again, we can be well known.
The devil doesn’t care, He will go after anyone that is willing to drink of the mud of sexual immorality to bring dishonor to the name of the Lord. That’s why it is important that we take heed and never leave our marriages vulnerable.
If you are married, your first ministry is your marriage. God will not fault you for making sure that your marriage has integrity. Your ministry might be a mess, but it is better to have a messy ministry than to have a messy marriage. This is no excuse to allow your ministry to be in disarray.
When a man marries a ministry, it is adultery.
Now this is not to say that this is the case with Tullian Tchividjian.
I will say that up to this point, it gives the appearance that there was neglect in the marriage. It very well could have been both of them neglecting each other. Or it could be just one person neglecting the other. Sometimes a man could use ministry as an excuse to get away from a wife that is seeking his attention. Or there could be other resolvable issues that he or she is seeking to get away from.
Again this is speculative because we do not know the circumstances.
But it gives us a glimpse into the fact that whatever the case may be, we need to be more diligent about maintaining our marriages with integrity. If there are differences, and no marriage on earth doesn’t have differences, to do the best to resolve them as quickly as possible. Otherwise the enemy will exploit those differences just as satan did in the Garden of Eden.
I find it that many will not learn from this lesson and more adulterous relationships will continue, but it is not worth going to hell over. And it is not worth losing your place in the Body of Christ to lead people to live holy lives before God.
Some will learn from this lesson and begin to make changes to foster good marriages while in ministry. Many will make the necessary heart and attitude changes so that they could avoid the same pitfalls of many marriages.
Some will go the extra mile to see that each others needs is met. To pray and seek the help of God to have a healthy marriage.
Not all marriages that end in adultery is a porn and masturbation issue.
However, we should check to make sure that this is not an issue.
Finally, in reading comment on FB, a person shared that adultery was used to get out of the ministry.
It is possible because it’s called (newly coined) Ministerial Suicide By Adultery.
The person shared that it’s been done before by many persons in the ministry.
It’s when a person has had enough of ministry that the deliberately commit adultery because they know that it’s a sure way to be removed from the pulpit. In a way, it may have some truth to it, but, why not just resign the pulpit? Or why not groom an experienced pastor to assume the pulpit?
It’s so much better than conceiving a disgraceful way to end a ministry.
Usually, after the pastor has an adulterous relationship, the flock abandons the ministry.
It’s not rare that people stay to make the remaining ministry work. It has been done where recovery is possible. Some churches survive and thrive. Others experience a decline in attendance, thus reducing its numbers, but the church remains intact. Others have closed their doors forever.
We must never underestimate the power of the enemy to destroy a ministry.
Again, this is a level playing field and everyone need to be even more diligent, sober, and vigilant.
Father, we pray for this family that they would recover from the snare of the enemy. That the grace of God would enter their minds and foster an atmosphere of healing. May repentance be granted from God. May God restore to them the joy of His salvation. Lord, let your will be done.
Let us recognize the price of sexual failure. But let us also recognize that forgiveness is granted to those that repent of wickedness. The Body of Christ is stained once again. The fiery dart of the wicked one has once again been shot. It has found it’s mark because the shield of faith was dropped in battle.
Lord, we cannot cover sin for to do so, no one can prosper. But when we confess and forsake sin, we shall obtain mercy.
Lord, there is no excuse for this. For You have given us everything that we need to overcome.
The blood of Jesus is available as always to wash us and make us clean, provided we come with humble hearts to seek its cleansing power.
Only the blood of Jesus is powerful enough to remove the stains of sin. Only the grace of God is powerful enough to sustain the weak in weak moments. Let Your grace prevail. Let not the enemy gloat over this.
In Jesus’ name. Amen.
The story could be read here.
For the last few months, I’ve noticed some titles. I take note of these things because there is no question that when this topic is out there with increased frequency, it is possible that a woman or some women are about to engage in sex with a male pastor.
There is no question about the fact that there are more married pastors than there’s single pastors, but I find that just because the pastor is married, to a single or married wrong minded woman, to them, it doesn’t mean that he is “off limits.” The wrong woman mistakenly assumes that he is fair game.
Dissatisfaction within the marriage happens for a number of reasons, and it happens in every marriage. However, it is not a good reason to look over the other side of the pulpit or pew to engage in sexual immorality.
Another woman, whether a prostitute or a vulnerable church woman is not the solution to solve dissatisfaction in the marriage. To have the wrong pastor is not the answer.
All it takes is the right set of circumstances to set up sexual immorality, and the game is on.
Woman that attempt to engage in sex with a pastor may be filled with romance fantasies that lead to sin. Just as men engage in sexual fantasies, women engage in romance fantasies.
Pastors are vulnerable due to being emotionally and physically drained after preaching. That’s why it’s always best for a pastor to retire to his study to escape these vulnerabilities.
But he must escape other temptations on Sunday afternoon. Watching sports with cheerleaders. Watching movies with sex in it. Watching news with club dressy women. Watching shows with sex laced trailers and commercials.
Checking the Internet and getting bombarded with provocative women and chatting with women in the chat rooms.
When pastors go to the store or supermarket, the checkout counter is filled with salacious titles and sex pictures.
More pastors open themselves to being exposed to material inadvertently and then they deliberately go after flesh.
After the preaching of the Word of God, the anointing to preach lifts off of the man of God. The trek down the mountain top is full of booby traps, trip wires, ambushes, and IED’s (improvised explosive devices). I’ll get to IED’s for pastors in this blog.
Dr. Archibald D. Hart once said that sex is a great “pick me up.” In either case, whether the man of God feels like he’s conquered the world in his preaching, he wants a “reward.” When he feels that he didn’t nail his sermon, or he feels emotionally down, he wants a “pick me up.”
Women instinctively this pick up in understanding the emotional vulnerability of a man.
For instance in 1 Kings 21:1, Ahab wanted Naboth’s vineyard. Naboth told Ahab that it belonged to him, given to Naboth as an inheritance from his fathers.
Covetousness driven him to have Naboth’s vineyard and when Naboth said “no,” Ahab’s countenance changed. Ahab returned to his residence and Jezebel observed his countenance.
1 Kings 21:4-5 says, “So Ahab went into his house sullen and displeased because of the word which Naboth the Jezreelite had spoken to him; for he had said, “I will not give you the inheritance of my fathers.” And he lay down on his bed, and turned away his face, and would eat no food. But Jezebel his wife came to him, and said to him, “Why is your spirit so sullen that you eat no food?”
Jezebel, as with women in general, will pick up the mood of a man just by reading his body language and countenance.
When they ask “What’s wrong,” the wrong woman will steer a man.
The rest of the story ended in Naboth’s death.
The wrong woman is able to pick up dissatisfaction in a pastor’s marriage and will attempt to be a voice as well as become sexually available to connect with him.
Now ladies, it’s important for you to understand that you are not married to him and you have no business becoming an intermediary. What I have also come to realize is that there are many women that will not accept responsibility for their actions and place the blame on the pastor.
Both must be blamed.
The wrong pastor and the wrong women.
The pastor didn’t maintain his sexual integrity with his wife. Allowed personal issues to become blockades to reconciliation, and never sought help from other pastors to deal with his personal issues. There is also his personal life that must be dealt with.
Is he watching porn and masturbating?
Whether he is having marital issues or not, porn and masturbation is a clear sign of disconnection that the wife cannot ignore. Extracurricular sexual activity, without committing adultery with another body is always at the root of many issues in a marriage relationship.
The “wrong woman” will pick that disconnection up.
In Genesis chapter 3, the devil entered the serpent to deceive Eve. However, based on preponderance, the devil was watching the interaction between Adam and Eve and concluded that Eve was inquisitive. The disconnection between Adam and Eve was detected and that’s when the enemy made his move.
Because of the disconnection, the enemy was able to make his move and plunged all men into death.
Hence, when the wrong woman detects the disconnection between a pastor and his wife, and she makes her move.
On the other hand, the wrong pastor seek vulnerable, insecure, emotionally unstable women too. It is never one sided. Sometimes, “worlds” collide under the right/wrong set of circumstances. With the wrong pastor, he has now become a predator and seeks to take advantage. He has the ability to see who is wiling to engage in sexual immorality and deceive a woman.
This is where women have to learn to guard their emotions and be on guard. The wrong pastor will turn into a serpent right before your eyes. He will be subtle like the serpent in Genesis 3. At first, it appears innocent, harmless, and safe. Pastors will not make their move until he knows that he’s won your heart. You trust him. You feel safe around him.
You don’t see it coming.
He touches your hand. Strokes your shoulders. He kisses you on the cheek. He’s re-assuring you with words that you wanted to hear. Not realizing that the wrong pastor is playing with your affections. This goes on regularly and then he makes his move. He perverts the Word of God as you give token resistance. You believe him and the rest is history.
“…and sin, when it is finished, brings forth death.”
There are other women that know to stay away from them. They recognize the signs when he makes his move and they blow the whistle. They run from them quickly before trouble manifests.
Proverbs 14:15 says “The simple believes every word, but the prudent considers well his steps.”
Proverbs 22:3 says “A prudent man foresees evil and hides himself, but the simple pass on and are punished.”
This is the improvised explosive device.
It happens on both sides.
The wrong women lay the explosives just as good as the wrong pastor.
When it explodes, it leaves body parts all over the place.
However, it’s deeper than that.
Some women lust for the pastor as much as some pastors lust for women in the house of worship.
In the church, there are many women looking for “love.”
This is code for “sex.”
Many will not own up to it, nor admit it, but this is the bottom line.
Few women know how to avoid a good looking single or married pastor. Even when the pastor is walking in the Word to maintain his sanctification, there’s some un-sanctified women that will cross the line.
Younger women should learn well from sanctified women of God how to avoid the pitfalls of pastoral sexual immorality with congregants.
I’ve seen it happen to a man of God. A seductress came in and wrecked his home and church. Because of unbridled lust in his heart, he succumbed to an evil woman, and the rest was history.
In almost every generation, we hear of horrid stories of pastoral sexual misconduct but few of us look at the other side.
The mistress covertly comes and goes. Nothing is hardly ever mentioned because sometimes the woman is made out to be the victim. As pure as heaven. However, if you look closely in the Scriptures, you will see that the book of Proverbs uncovers several kinds of wicked women.
loud and rebellious,
religious or form of godliness,
Their house is the staircase to hell, the Bible says. See Proverbs 5:5, 7:27.
Here is some very helpful information in the Word of God to help women avoid this danger that lurks in the flesh.
As in previous blogs, we know that pastors take advantage of emotionally unstable women. However, we must remain focused on this issue because of sin. The Lord Jesus lovingly confronted sexual sins among women when He was at Jacob’s well, when the woman that was caught in adultery was brought to Him, when Jesus cast seven devils out of Mary Magdalene, and another sinful woman that cried tears on the feet of Jesus and she wiped them away with her hair, for her sins were many.
In each instance, it wasn’t condemnation but Jesus was ministering to them to deliver them.
We all know that it’s not just the woman but the men with lust in their hearts.
Part of the mystique of women is their ability to make it seem like it’s not the way it looks.
Hence, the need to “beautify.”
The need for “makeup and false eye lashes and eye brows.”
The need to “nip and tuck.”
The need to “smooth it over.”
The need to “flatten the tummy, push up the cleavage, and firm up the backside.”
These things cover a multitude of faults and sins.
Pastor, this verse is for you.
Proverbs 6:25 “Do not lust after her beauty in your heart, nor let her allure you with her eyelids.”
Attire of a harlot does happen in church services, every Sunday. Praise and worship, prayer, preaching. It doesn’t matter. There is no fear of God before their eyes. If people were afraid of God, people would not do the things they do. And “saved” folk wouldn’t wear what they wear; like as if they were going to the club.
Proverbs 7:6-10 says “For at the window of my house I looked through my lattice, And saw among the simple, I perceived among the youths, a young man devoid of understanding, passing along the street near her corner; and he took the path to her house In the twilight, in the evening, in the black and dark night. And there a woman met him, with the attire of a harlot, and a crafty heart.”
The opposite is modest apparel.
1 Peter 3:3-4 says this about wives, but it is also applicable to women in general. “Do not let your adornment be merely outward — arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel — rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”
1 Timothy 2:8-10 says “I desire therefore that the men pray everywhere, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting; in like manner also, that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing, but, which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works.”
Low cleavage body hugging dresses, tight pants, stilettos, sleeveless blouses, above the knee dresses is not “modest apparel.”
These things masks the reality and attracts the dogs in the house of worship.
You could always tell the kind of person they are by their conduct. No matter how pretty they look, their conduct is the reality. Look past the smooth words and you will see the real person emerge. Look past the beauty and you will never be deceived.
If some women would own up to it, the Lord could help them avoid the obvious. With single pastors it’s one thing. But a married pastor is a different story.
The ring on a pastor’s ring finger doesn’t mean much to the passive hunter looking to be a home and church wrecker. The shame is not too great. Let’s get past the shame and focus on what the Word says.
As a born again woman that loves the Lord, it is important that you grow in your love for the only Man that should be King in your heart.
The Lord Jesus Christ.
THE LOVE FOR GOD
In Luke 10:27, Jesus said “So he answered and said, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength, and with all your mind,’ and ‘your neighbor as yourself.’”
Jesus was quoting from Deuteronomy 6:4-6 that says “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one! You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. “And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart.”
To abstain from lusting after being the pastor’s mistress, your love for God must be unadulterated.
Listen to what the Lord said about loving the Father.
John 14:15, 21 “If you love Me, keep My commandments. He who has My commandments and keeps them, it is he who loves Me. And he who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I will love him and manifest Myself to him.”
If you claim to love the Lord, a moment of lust throws your alleged love for God down the drain.
All sin is committed when person no longer loves the Lord. Doesn’t matter if you are saved or not. To cheat on God is the first step to all sin. It means that even though the Lord could satisfy the longing in your heart, you long for that which is forbidden. This is what happened to Eve in the Garden. Adam gave her what the Lord said but she looked for a way to have that which was forbidden.
It was a combination of the desire for power and the desire to have what you were told not to have.
For some women, even though they were told that they cannot have a married man, it isn’t enough. To accomplish the goal of having a married man you must stop loving the Lord.
To reverse this, you must get into the place of prayer and fasting to suppress the mind and body.
Then you must read some Scriptures to help you subdue the flesh.
MAKE NO PROVISIONS FOR THE FLESH
Romans 13:13-14 “Let us walk properly, as in the day, not in revelry and drunkenness, not in lewdness and lust, not in strife and envy. But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to fulfill its lusts.”
ABSTAIN FROM FLESHLY LUSTS
1 Peter 2:11 “Beloved, I beg you as sojourners and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts which war against the soul,”
As a note, the word “abstain” means to “hold oneself out.” Or to hold out.
SUBDUE AND DOMINATE YOUR FLESH
1 Corinthians 9:26-27 “Therefore I run thus: not with uncertainty. Thus I fight: not as one who beats the air. But I discipline my body and bring it into subjection, lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified.”
1 Corinthians 6:18-20 “Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s.”
GUARD YOUR HEART
Proverbs 4:23 (AMP) “Keep and guard your heart with all vigilance and above all that you guard, for out of it flow the springs of life.”
GUARD YOUR EYES (WATCHING TV)
Psalm 101:3 (AMP) “I will set no base or wicked thing before my eyes. I hate the work of them who turn aside [from the right path]; it shall not grasp hold of me.”
1 John 5:18-19 “We know that whoever is born of God does not sin; but he who has been born of God keeps himself, and the wicked one does not touch him. We know that we are of God, and the whole world lies under the sway of the wicked one.”
WALK IN THE SPIRIT
Galatians 5:16-17 “I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh. For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary to one another, so that you do not do the things that you wish.”
1 Thessalonians 4:1-5 “Finally then, brethren, we urge and exhort in the Lord Jesus that you should abound more and more, just as you received from us how you ought to walk and to please God; for you know what commandments we gave you through the Lord Jesus.
For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God;”
SUBMIT TO GOD & RESIST THE DEVIL
James 4:7-8 “Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.”
You meet a hot looking single in church. She is just too sexy to resist. You ask her out for a date. But in the back of your mind, it will be more than a date. In her mind, it’s what she planned all along. To capture a male that’s been eyeing you for a little while. She accepts your proposal and you take her out to dinner.
As planned, you then go to your house.
One thing leads to another.
You end up in bed.
In most cases these days, skip dinner and just go straight to bed.
Premarital sex is a “so what” kind of thing these days.
Maintaining your virginity is no longer sacred to many professed believers.
Growing up as a young Christian, the challenges of sexuality were all around me.
Yes, I was even propositioned by a homosexual music minister in a Baptist church.
In school, peer pressure to look to have sex abounded and I would be teased for being a “virgin.”
That didn’t stop me from sexual experimentation or indulging in masturbation. Even while courting, the temptation was there to have sex but I would let off the sexual tension through masturbation.
Yes, I am being truthful about this because almost every young boy upon reaching puberty will experiment sexually. By the time most men are married, they will either have had sex with a girl or boy, both sexes, or with themselves, or all of the above.
In any case, males will have had some sexual experience before they are married.
Single women will more than likely marry a sexually experienced male. Even if he is a virgin, if he has masturbated, he is sexually active with himself. And the same could be said of women that are virgins that are sexually active with themselves.
As I read a Christian Post three part article on premarital sex in the church, I was startled by the number of single Christians engaging in fornication.
Most Christians or professed single believers cross the line more often than we thought.
According to this article, 11% of professed single believers abstain from fornication.
This means that in the approximately 320,000 American Christian churches, 89% of single professed believers engaged in fornication.
According to several educated Christian counselors and Christian sex therapists, as soon as they took note of the power of the Internet, they knew that a storm of epic proportions would be underway and would overwhelm the church.
Today, the winds of perversion are blowing away the people that once stood for righteousness, holiness, and this is a clear indication of where America is not headed, but is already there.
The bed of fornication.
In Revelation chapters 17 and 18, though it is symbolic, we must never forget that any Scripture that is symbolic is a revelation of actuality. Just take a look at the conditions of this world and the condition of the church and you will see that what is revealed in the Book of Revelation is a true depiction of today’s conditions.
This is not to say that we are in the tribulation period, but we are rapidly progressing towards it. I am well aware that there is much disagreement about the dispensation that we are in but put aside the differences and see the reality before your eyes that we are in the bed of fornication and that we are drinking from the wine of her fornication.
2 Timothy 3:1-9 from the Message Bible says this about the last days.
“Don’t be naive. There are difficult times ahead. As the end approaches, people are going to be self–absorbed, money–hungry, self–promoting, stuck–up, profane, contemptuous of parents, crude, coarse, dog–eat–dog, unbending, slanderers, impulsively wild, savage, cynical, treacherous, ruthless, bloated windbags, addicted to lust, and allergic to God.
They’ll make a show of religion, but behind the scenes they’re animals. Stay clear of these people. These are the kind of people who smooth–talk themselves into the homes of unstable and needy women and take advantage of them; women who, depressed by their sinfulness, take up with every new religious fad that calls itself “truth.”
They get exploited every time and never really learn. These men are like those old Egyptian frauds Jannes and Jambres, who challenged Moses. They were rejects from the faith, twisted in their thinking, defying truth itself. But nothing will come of these latest impostors. Everyone will see through them, just as people saw through that Egyptian hoax.”
The world is drunk with the wine of fornication.
This statistic above is a clear indication of the world’s perversion that has undeniably infiltrated the church and almost engulfing every known place where righteousness was thought to be lived and preached.
You see, it’s not just the pinnacle of sexual immorality called homosexuality that is a clear and present danger to the church. It is all forms of sexual immorality. What went under the radar is the ship and aircrafts of fornication and adultery. As you have noticed, we’ve spoken out against the winds of homosexuality, and rightfully so. But we have failed to rein in the tsunami of fornication. And when you look at the definition of fornication, the Greek word for fornication in some places in the NT is “pornea.”
Pornography is graphic illegal sex between two unmarried persons. This includes adultery. And yes, married couples foolishly engage in video taping their sex.
Because the pastors are engaged in porn and masturbation, we have very little, to nothing to stand on to curb this trend unless we repent before we are exposed by God. Some of us pastors are just as drunk with the wine of fornication as the world.
However, the Lord is plenteous in mercy and full of compassion. Slow to wrath and anger. When we turn from our wicked ways, He will abundantly pardon us and cleanse us with the precious blood of Jesus. His wrath will turn and His mercy will overwhelm us. Provided that we repent.
While watching Pastor Keith Moore ministering under a strong anointing. He used to teach at Rhema Bible Training Center in Tulsa OK under the late Dr. Kenneth Hagin and pastors a church in Branson MO, and Sarasota FL.
He shared about repentance.
A lost message these days.
He said that the worst place for anyone to be in is in a refusal to repent.
He said that the problem is not with God forgiving us. The problem is with people that refuse to repent. He shared that God will give us space to repent. But when you deliberately refuse to repent to continue in sin, the only thing left is the judgment of God. Paul shared that if we would judge ourselves we would not be judged so we would not be condemned with the world (see 1 Corinthians 11:31).
While it is never good to sin, we must never reach a place in our lives where we refuse to repent. The moment we deliberately refuse to repent, there is no hope. Judgment must fall. It doesn’t have to fall upon you. At any time before death, we can turn from fornication and live victorious lives in Jesus.
Here is the link to the articles found in the Christian Post.
When David committed adultery with Bathsheba and had her husband killed to cover up his sin, David was given space to repent. In his pride and arrogance, he thought that he got away with it. It was only until Nathan the prophet, confronted David.
Actually, it was the Lord that confronted David through the prophet.
The Lord is plenteous in mercy. The Lord is slow to wrath.
Nonetheless, He is still holy, righteous, and He must impose the penalty for violating the Word of God.
God delivered David from the lion and bear. God also delivered David from Goliath.
Yet, the Goliath in his flesh remained unconquered.
The Psalms that David sung and perhaps played showed that he was a man of prayer, praise and worship. As a man, it is easy to say that David had strong spiritual roots, a strong love for God, and a very strong will but when it came to sex, we see that the sexual misconduct of David was egregious. To outright have a trusted and loyal man murdered to cover his sin is vicious, callous, and cold.
According to the law for committing the crime of adultery, he and Bathsheba should have been put to death.
Leviticus 20:10 says, “The man who commits adultery with another man’s wife, he who commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, the adulterer and the adulteress, shall surely be put to death.”
The Lord elected to make a point with leaders. He put the sin of adultery and murder away from David, Bathsheba gave birth for nothing because God killed his son, and his battles will be from his own household. Men will take David’s wives and lie with them out in the sun because what David did was done in secret (see 2 Samuel 12:7-4).
Many pastors believe that they too, will escape unscathed.
Not one pastor has ever escaped. Not one pastor has ever got more blessed. Not one pastor has ever returned to the power of the anointing that was once on their lives.
The mistresses and adulteresses never got the glory they sought for stealing a man from his wife.
They never achieve the place of the first wife.
Adultery is never rewarded. It’s condemned and God never celebrates the violation of covenant as established in Genesis 2:24.
Never let anyone, including a fallen leader fool you. Never let yourself fall into the trap of smooth words. God is not mocked.
Many of us that watched porn and masturbated fail to gain victory because of the inability to discipline our minds and flesh to refuse to touch other woman, ourselves, or both. Our secret thoughts run rampant while we portray ourselves as “holy men of God.” For some of us, far be it from the real truth. We harbor things in our hearts like the failure of the Israeli leaders of removing the high place for dual worship purposes.
This battle rages in us because we are attached to the pleasures of sin.
The battle was won on the cross of Christ. It would be there that the Lord would condemn sin in the flesh of the Lord Jesus. It is on that ol’ rugged cross that sin would be defeated. The crucified life is no longer evasive but when we evade the spot light of the Word on our hearts, the ol’ rugged cross is a thing we set aside to enjoy the pleasures of sin.
“O wretched man that I am. Who will deliver me from this body of death?” Paul’s answer is simple.
“I thank God – through Jesus Christ my Lord.”
The key is understanding the Lordship of Jesus.
James 4:7 said this….Therefore, submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.”
Submitting to the Lordship of Jesus on a moment by moment basis ensures victory every time. It is only when we submit to the Lordship of Jesus that we are qualified to resist the devil. It is only then that the devil will flee from us. Just as the devil fled Jesus after 40 days of temptation in the wilderness.
Pastoral sexual misconduct is more normal than holiness these days.
This can change when we realize that we are hurting the heart of the Father in the same way that Adam and Eve hurt God. Our momentary lapse of judgment to experience the pleasure of that which is forbidden suppresses caring about how God feels about your sin.
Conviction is suppressed because compromise rules the heart.
Equally worse is the heart of the wife and children that were betrayed.
The wife goes through many emotional roller coasters trying to make sense of a selfish, senseless act of defiance of God and marriage vows. The children are left with an example of a callous act. Sometimes they grow up later and never recover. Commit the same sins, and continue a generation curse that could only be stopped when one child recognizes that sin never pays and its price is always death.
The reputation of a pastor is forever tarnished.
Proverbs 6:32-33 says “Whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding; he who does so destroys his own soul. Wounds and dishonor he will get, and his reproach will not be wiped away.”
Foolishly, they return to minister in hopes that God would endorse them again, but that will never be the case.
Every man that committed adultery is on a failed comeback trail. A vain attempt to redeem themselves. Again, while the Lord does forgive once repentance is made, the former glory is never attained.
Prevention begins when we allow ourselves to have eyes on our lives. The nature of Secret Sexual Sins is just that.
As long as we prevent ourselves from harboring secrets in our minds, we can keep ourselves from falling into the trap of elitism, empowerment, entitlement, and expediency. When we believe that we are powerful enough to abstain, like Paul said, “Take heed, lest you fall.”
The anointing and grace of God in the pulpit is very easy to hide behind. When service is over, we are at our most vulnerable state. This is when we are attacked the most. A demonic plant of immoral women will look for these weaknesses and exploit them with their beauty. Or when you are having marital problems at home, the sexually immoral woman will act like Delilah, a prototype of Jezebel, have you lay on her lap, and divulge your heart.
In an emotionally charged moment, she makes her move, or you make your move, and adulterous sex is very easy to fall into.
As a pastor, you must never cross the professional line to take advantage of a woman’s vulnerability. Some pastors will use their oratorical skills and personality to woo women into the bedroom. Blinded by smooth words, she is easily taken advantaged of. At the same time, you cannot read between the lines when Delilah shows up to church.
Her beauty will smite you.
Proverbs 7:21-23 says,
“With her enticing speech she caused him to yield, with her flattering lips she seduced him. Immediately he went after her, as an ox goes to the slaughter, or as a fool to the correction of the stocks, till an arrow struck his liver. As a bird hastens to the snare, he did not know it would cost his life.”
Proverbs 6:25-26 says, “Do not lust after her beauty in your heart, nor let her allure you with her eyelids. For by means of a harlot a man is reduced to a crust of bread; and an adulteress will prey upon his precious life.”
What worse is that the adulterous woman is the staircase to hell.
Yes, according to Hebrews 13:4, God judges the adulterer and adulteress and according to 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, adulterers and fornicators will not inherit the kingdom of God. If you live an unrepentant life, you will go to hell. While God forgives, forgiveness is granted when we repent and sin no more. The grace of God doesn’t give us permission to sin. The mercy of God is designed to prevent that which we rightfully deserve.
Then there are the Jezebels that look for strong males, weak men in the pulpit. Jezebel will give up the use of her body to gain power. Her plan is very simple, yet effective. The end result is always inevitable. Her death. Not that all of them will die physically, but her plan dies when the church splits.
A strong man of God will never surrender his relationship with God for a cheap thrill.
It’s too high a price to pay.
Men that committed adultery never recover to the place when their anointing of the Lord is strong. They become a shadow of what they were. They never walk in the place of anointing because the Lord never condones the act of adultery. If you desire to throw ministry away, a pastor first must throw his relationship with the Lord away.
The precursor of throwing your relationship with the Lord away is when you have lust in your heart for other women. It is there that the imaginations of the heart run unchecked. TV commercials, the Internet, and other things is strategically laid out like a minefield. Every image that the eyes observe is intended to saturate your mind. It is is part of the plan of the devil to choke and strangle the Word in your heart. Overwhelmed with sexual images, the mind thirsts and hunger for sex.
The rest is history.
When we fail to govern our eyes, and cast down imaginations and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, we store up within our mind sexual images that become high places for idolatrous worship. Ultimately, they become strongholds. Most images are intended to get a rise out of you. Other images are harmless but because of the unregenerate mind that is not renewed, we can make someone that is not dressed sexually very sexual (see Proverbs 27:20, Job 31:1, and Matthew 5:27-30).
Submitting to the Lordship of Jesus is the only way to combat this onslaught of the enemy.
When we obey the Lord to discipline our eyes and obey the prompting of the Holy Spirit to escape, victory is assured. The moment we disobey the prompting of the Holy Spirit and refuse to discipline our eyes, is certain destruction.
Sexual misconduct can be prevented.
It’s a matter of returning to the Lord and understanding the long term ramifications of falling into deliberate sin.
Secret Sexual Sin is never worth it because in the end, death is its only payment.
Proverbs 8:13 says, “The fear of the Lord is to hate evil; pride and arrogance and the evil way and the perverse mouth I hate.”
Pride and arrogance is always at the root of a fallen leader. In most cases, a sense of invincibility comes into the mind of a man and you begin to have a false sense of security. Security in the sense that you believe nothing is going to happen to you, or that you would not get caught.
There was once a king in Africa that was married. He had sex with a prostitute that was HIV/AIDS positive. While there is no such thing as unprotected sex because you either have sex or you don’t. Any way my point is that he wore no condom. Even condoms fail but the failure is not the point. Where your hands travel and where your penis goes, penetration is not necessary for infection.
That’s my point.
However, this king decided to have sex without a condom. A few years ago, on the continent of Africa, many people were ignorant of the transmission of diseases (STD). So, they would engage in sex and today, the pandemic of AIDS is an international crisis. This king of a nation thought that by taking a shower and washing his genitals, he would not get infected.
Pride and arrogance, when not removed by humility and wisdom is part of a male’s inability to guard against urges and impulses, which, in turn, dictates choices. When you got your flesh and mind set to engage in sex with a person, wisdom is thrown to the wind.
Psalm 107:17 says “Fools! Because of their transgressions and because of their iniquities are afflicted.”
The word “fools” means “to be perverse,” and it also means “one who despises wisdom.”
When it comes to sex, males will bypass every alarm just to engage in sex. When pride and arrogance kicks in, there is nothing that may stop him except if something happens by way of divine intervention.
Asa, king of Israel comes to mind when it comes to pride and arrogance.
However, let me share this. No matter the denomination or non denomination, when a leader becomes full of himself or herself, it is very easy to make a series of decisions that lacks basic judgment. When you see that a leader fails to operate in good judgment, it is a matter of time before they will make the ultimate decision that will cost him or her the pulpit.
We leaders sometimes forget that we operate under delegated authority. Leaders are not absolute authority. The measure or rule of authority is defined by the boundaries of the Word of God. To exceed the boundaries established by the Lord in His Word is extremely costly, and deadly.
Asa became king over Judah and Benjamin. In the 14th chapter of 2 Chronicles, Asa made a series of reformations that virtually destroyed idol worship and sexual immorality in the region. However, Asa left one thing undone. The high place remained. Anytime you leave something undone, it is indicative of not fully walking in obedience to the known will of God. If you are going to clear the deck, make every effort to clear the deck. Otherwise, it will come back at you in a very bad way.
Asa was tested. The Army of Asa was only 580,000 men. Then the Ethiopians came against Asa. 1 million men and 300 hundred chariots. Asa cried to the Lord and Judah prevailed. The Spirit of the Lord came upon Azariah the son of Oded and gave Asa the Word of the Lord (see 2 Chronicles 15). When you get to the 16th chapter, that’s when Asa lost it. He made a treaty with Syria to prevent Israel from from boxing in Judah. Israel was defeated by the Syrians but the Lord rebuked Asa for trusting in his own wisdom to get out of a situation.
The prophet Hanani gave Asa these words from the Lord.
“And at that time Hanani the seer came to Asa king of Judah, and said to him: Because you have relied on the king of Syria, and have not relied on the Lord your God, therefore the army of the king of Syria has escaped from your hand. Were the Ethiopians and the Lubim not a huge army with very many chariots and horsemen? Yet, because you relied on the Lord, He delivered them into your hand. For the eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to show Himself strong on behalf of those whose heart is loyal to Him. In this you have done foolishly; therefore from now on you shall have wars.”
Asa was so furious and so full of himself that he put the prophet in jail.
Note also that the prophet said that “In this you have done foolishly…”
Do you recall Psalm 107:17?
The opposite of foolishness is wisdom.
Asa failed to call upon the Lord and called upon Syria. In the same manner, the deliverance would have been assured. God came through against 1 million men and 300 hundred chariots. To come against the Syrians would have been the same results. The end for Asa was tragic. Asa was diseased in his feet. To me, that signified Asa will walk the earth no more. Asa sought relief from the doctors and never thought to look to the Lord, first to repent, and second to get healed. Mind you that at any time, Asa could have repented and cried to the Lord to be healed, but pride and arrogance led him to his grave.
Asa sought his own means and look where it led him.
To his grave.
So it is with Secret Sexual Sins.
There are four things that is associated with pride and arrogance.
1. Elitism. 2. Empowerment. 3. Entitlement. 4. Expediency.
When you believe that you are elite, you will feel empowered to do anything. When you believe within yourself that you are empowered, you will deceive yourself into thinking that you are entitled to any man or woman to have them sexually. When you believe you are entitled, because of a lack of wisdom, you will do anything, including break the Word of God and the laws of man to achieve your prize of orgasm, hence expediency.
Sadly, many men (including myself) have fallen for this. In various ways, we have sinned before God because we thought that we were invincible. That nothing would happen. That we would get away with it.
There are no winners with pride and arrogance. The devil is the biggest loser of them all. Sadly, many men and women that were to be of God will lose with the devil. It doesn’t have to be this way.
“Humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God…”
The pulpit is the second most powerful place in the world. The place of personal prayer in the life of leaders and believers is the first most powerful place on earth. The grace of God is there that permits us to speak the Word of God. The oracles and ability comes from the Father. We somehow, deceived ourselves into thinking that it’s all about us and the next thing that happens is a series of deliberate decisions to satisfy ourselves sexually.
The only way out of this is humility.
I’ll leave you with this.
Humbleness of mind and humility, once acted upon, will prevent humiliation.